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70 Funny Fishing Quotes

Fishing is often seen as a peaceful and tranquil activity that is always fun, especially when you catch a big one! But sometimes, the little things make fishing even more enjoyable – like a good joke.

Anglers love to talk about their biggest catches, the ones that got away, and sometimes the most unlikely places they’ve found fish. You can add some spice to the stories by throwing in a few funny fishing quotes for good laughter.

Quotes about fishing can be serious, inspirational, or just downright funny. They also summarize our passion for this outdoor activity in a way that only a few sentences can. It will ensure you have a lot of fun while enjoying your favorite pastime.

Read on for 70 of the best funny fishing quotes that will have you hooked in no time!

funny fishing quotes
Source: Canva Pro

Funny Fishing Quotes

  1. “Fishing is like dating; it’s all catch and release until you find a keeper.” – Anonymous 
  1. “A woman who has never seen her husband fishing, doesn’t know what a patient man she married!” – Anonymous 
  1. “There’s a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.” – Steven Wright
  1. “Dear Lord, give me the serenity to accept the size of fish I catch, the courage not to lie about it and the wisdom to know that none of my fishing buddies would believe me anyway!” – Anonymous 
  1. “Fly fishermen are born honest, but they get over it.” – Anonymous 
  1. “Fly-fishing is the most fun you can have standing up.” – Anonymous 
  1. “The two best times to fish is when it’s raining and when it ain’t.” – Patrick F McManus
  1. “It is to be observed that ‘angling’ is the name given to fishing by people who can’t fish.”
  1. “Somebody just back of you, while you are fishing, is as bad as someone looking over your shoulder while you write a letter to your girl.”- Ernest Hemingway
  1. “An angler is a man who spends rainy days sitting on a muddy bank of rivers doing nothing because his wife won’t let him do it at home.” – Anonymous 
  1. “Sell a man a fish, he eats for a day, teach a man how to fish, you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.” – Anonymous 
  1. “Don’t tell fish stories where the people know you; but particularly, don’t tell them where they know the fish.” – Mark Twain
  1. “Remember when your GPS and a fish finder were rolled into one trusty unit called grandpa?” – Anonymous 
  1. “I look into my fly box and think about all the elements I should consider in choosing the perfect fly: water temperature, what stage of development the bugs are in, what the fish are eating right now. Then I remember what a guide told me: ‘Ninety percent of what a trout eats is brown and fuzzy and about five-eighths of an inch long.” – Alison Moir-Smith
  1. “The confirmed man of trout should resolve to get along with wood ticks. Any other procedure would fail because the wood tick is determined to get along with trout fishermen.” – Gordon MacQuarrie
  1. “Comedians get jokes offered to them, rock stars get women and underwear thrown on stage, and I get guys that want to take me fishing.” – Les Claypool
  1. “There are only two occasions when Americans respect privacy, especially in Presidents. Those are prayer and fishing.” – Herbert Hoover
  1. “I’ve managed to convince my wife that somewhere in the Bible, it says, “Man cannot have too many shotguns and fishing poles.” – General Norman Schwarzkopf
  1. “There he stands, draped in more equipment than a telephone lineman, trying to outwit an organism with a brain no bigger than a breadcrumb and getting licked in the process.” – Paul O’Neil
  1. “Three-fourths of the Earth’s surface is water, and one-fourth is land. It is quite clear that the good Lord intended us to spend triple the amount of time fishing as taking care of the lawn.” – Chuck Clark
  2. “Good things come to those who bait.” – Anonymous 
  1. “You cannot catch trout with dry breeches.” – Spanish Proverb
  1. “May the holes in your net be no larger than the fish in it.” – Irish Proverb
  1. “If I fished only to capture fish, my fishing trips would have ended long ago.” – Zane Grey
  1. “I used to like fishing because I thought it had some larger significance. Now I like fishing because it’s the one thing I can think of that probably doesn’t.” – John Gierach
  1. “All Americans believe that they are born fishermen. For a man to admit a distaste for fishing would be like denouncing mother-love or hating moonlight.” – John Steinbeck
  1. “A fisherman is a jerk on one end of the line waiting for a jerk on the other.” – Anonymous 
  1. “All fishermen are liars; it’s an occupational disease with them like housemaid’s knee or editor’s ulcers.” – Beatrice Gray Cook 
  1. “As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.” – Jack Handey 
  1. “Even eminent chartered accountants are known, in their capacity as fishermen, blissfully to ignore differences between seven and 10 inches, half a pound and two pounds, three fish and a dozen fish.” – William Sherwood Fox
  1. “I fish better with a lit cigar; some people fish better with talent.” – Nick Lyons
  1. “Scholars have long known that fishing eventually turns men into philosophers. Unfortunately, it is almost impossible to buy decent tackle on a philosopher’s salary.” – Patrick McManus
  1. “Many men go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after.”- Henry David Thoreau
  1. “My biggest worry is that my wife (when I’m dead) will sell my fishing gear for what I said I paid for it.”- Koos Brandt
  1. “All the romance of trout fishing exists in the mind of the angler and is in no way shared by the fish.” – Harold F. Blaisdell
  1. “Fisherman’s prayer: Lord, help me to catch fish so large, that even I, in the telling of it, never need to lie.” – Anonymous 
  1. “If your concentration is getting bad, take up bass fishing. It will really improve your ability to focus. If you aren’t ready when that fish hits, you can’t set the hook.” – Lee Trevino
  1. “Wanted: Good woman – Must be able to clean, cook, sew, dig worms and clean fish. Must have boat and motor. Please send picture of boat and motor.” – Anonymous 
  1. “The fishing is a great relief for me. When I’m out there’s no cell phone ringing. I’m out there fishing with bears. I’m in the middle of God’s country catching tons of fish. I just absolutely love it.” – Rich Barry
  1. “I love fishing. You put that line in the water and you don’t know what’s on the other end. Your imagination is under there.” – Robert Altman
  1. “If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d by a shortage of fishing poles.” – Anonymous 
  1. “Look at where Jesus went to pick people. He didn’t go to the colleges… he got guys off the fishing docks.” – Jeff Foxworthy
  1. “Most of the world is covered by water. A fisherman’s job is simple: Pick out the best parts.” – Charles Waterman
  1. “Calling fishing a hobby is like calling brain surgery a job.” – Paul Schullery
  1. “What a tourist terms a plague of insects, the fly fisher calls a great hatch.” – Patrick F. McManus
  1. “Fishing is not an escape from life, but often a deeper immersion into it.” – Harry Middleton
  1. “Even eminent chartered accountants are known, in their capacity as fishermen, blissfully to ignore differences between seven and 10 inches, half a pound and two pounds, three fish and a dozen fish.” – William Sherwood Fox
  1. “You need a good gardener and a good fisherman. The cook is not required.”- William Sherwood Fox
  1. “Game fish are too valuable to be caught only once.” – Lee Wulff
  1. “I am firmly convinced that the ideal combination leading to a happy life is to have the time to both fish and read.” – Brian Murphy
  1. “Nothing makes a fish bigger than almost being caught.” – Anonymous 
  1. “Give a man a fish, and he has food for a day. Teach him how to fish and you can get rid of him for the entire weekend!” – Anonymous 
  1. “The Polynesians used to have a system where they proclaimed a fishing area as ‘taboo.’ If any fisherman was caught fishing in a taboo area, they would be killed. The Polynesians understood that the fish had to be given a chance to recover.” – Paul Watson
  1. “I am not against golf, since I cannot suspect it keeps armies of the unworthy from discovering trout.” – Paul O’Neil
  1. We ask a simple question, and that is all we wish… Are all fishermen liars, or do only liars fish? – William Sherwood Fox
  1. “There are always new places to go fishing. For any fisherman, there’s always a new place, always a new horizon.” – Jack Nicklaus
  1. “Anytime I can sneak in a moment to fish and ride horses, I’m a happy camper!” – George Foreman
  1. “Give a man a fish, and he will eat it for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.” – George Carlin
  1. “Angling is extremely time-consuming. That’s sort of the whole point.” -Thomas McGuane
  1. “Many of the most highly publicized events of my presidency are not nearly as memorable or significant in my life as fishing with my daddy.” – Jimmy Carter
  1. “He told us about Christ’s disciples being fisherman, and we were left to assume…that all great fishermen on the Sea of Galilee were fly fisherman and that John, the favorite, was a dry-fly fisherman.” – Norman Maclean
  1. “I thoroughly enjoy getting away from the game and going out fishing because it’s so relaxing, so quiet, and peaceful. I mean, there’s no noise other than nature… and it’s so different from what I do in a tournament situation that it just eases my mind.” – Tiger Woods
  1. “I only make movies to finance my fishing.” – Lee Marvin
  1. “One thing becomes clearer as one gets older and one’s fishing experience increases, and that is the paramount importance of one’s fishing companions.” – John Ashley
  1. “Fishing is much more than fish. It is the great occasion when we may return to the fine simplicity of our forefathers.” – Herbert Hoover
  1. “There is only one theory about angling in which I have perfect confidence, and this is that the two words, least appropriate to any statement, about it, are the words “always” and “never.” – Lord Edward Grey
  1. “A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other.” – Samuel Johnson
  1. “A worm is a small, reluctant animal used to capture a larger reluctant animal.” – Anonymous 
  1. “Fishing, with me, has always been an excuse to drink in the daytime.” – Jimmy Cannon
  1. “Hell, if I’d jumped on all the dames I’m supposed to have jumped on, I’d have had no time to go fishing.” – Clark Gable

Conclusion

Fishing is a great pastime that people of all ages can enjoy. It’s a fun way to relax and unwind and a great way to connect with nature.

Whether you’re a seasoned fisherman or just getting started, there’s always something new to learn about fishing. And, as these 70 funny fishing sayings show, there’s also much wisdom to glean from the experience.

You can also have fun, make great memories, and even bond with your fishing buddy and family while enjoying this time-honored activity. So, get out there for your fishing trip and start fishing today!

Diana Nadim
Fishing Expert
Diana began fishing at the age of seven, as it has been a long-time family tradition. From catching small bullheads to catching strippers on the backwaters of Bighorn, she loves to get out in the wild and have a marvelous day on the water. Her dad was an expert angler, and he taught her fishing along with her two siblings. They used to go to the Bighorn River in Montana and Henry’s fork, Idaho. As a pragmatic person, she is obsessed with creating well-researched and practical guides and reviews of the best fishing methods and gear.
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